It’s the underlying grain of truth that contributes to both states of perception.
Blonde Joke!!!
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he’s doing a show in a small town in West Texas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes.
Suddenly, a blonde woman in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting:
“I’ve heard enough of your stupid “Blonde Jokes”! What makes you think you can stereo type Women that way? What does the color of a person’s hair have to do with her worth as a human being ? It’s guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community, and from reaching our full potential as a person. You and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only Blondes, but Women in general…and all in the name of humor!”
The embarrassed Ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the Blonde yells, “You stay out of this, Mister! I’m talking to that little “Shit” on your knee”.
AGELESS WIT AND OBSERVATIONS
“If you don’t read the newspaper you are uninformed,
if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.”
Mark Twain
“If you don’t read the newspaper you are uninformed,
if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.”
Mark Twain
Suppose you were an idiot.
And suppose you were a member of Congress….
But then I repeat myself.
-Mark Twain
And suppose you were a member of Congress….
But then I repeat myself.
-Mark Twain
I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
-Winston Churchill
-Winston Churchill
A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
- George Bernard Shaw
- George Bernard Shaw
A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.
-G Gordon Liddy
-G Gordon Liddy
Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
-James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
-James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
-Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
-Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
-P.J. O’Rourke, Civil Libertarian
-P.J. O’Rourke, Civil Libertarian
Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else.
-Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
-Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
Government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
-Ronald Reagan (1986)
-Ronald Reagan (1986)
I don’t make jokes. I just watch the government
and report the facts.
-Will Rogers
and report the facts.
-Will Rogers
If you think health care is expensive now,
wait until you see what it costs when it’s free!
-P.J. O’Rourke
wait until you see what it costs when it’s free!
-P.J. O’Rourke
In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.
-Voltaire (1764)
-Voltaire (1764)
Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn’t mean politics won’t take an interest in you!
-Pericles (430 B.C.)
-Pericles (430 B.C.)
No man’s life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
-Mark Twain (1866?)
-Mark Twain (1866?)
Talk is cheap…except when Congress does it.
-Unknown
-Unknown
The government is like a baby’s alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other.
-Ronald Reagan
-Ronald Reagan
The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
-Winston Churchill
-Winston Churchill
The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
-Mark Twain
-Mark Twain
The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.
-Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
-Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
There is no distinctly Native American criminal class…save Congress.
-Mark Twain
-Mark Twain
What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.
-Edward Langley, Artist (1928 – 1995)
-Edward Langley, Artist (1928 – 1995)
A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.
-Thomas Jefferson
-Thomas Jefferson
Tags: Jokes, pain, political coorectness, quotations, sadness
